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Diagnosis Vampire!

Diagnosis Murder is one of my favorite snuggle beside the fire nostalgia trips to enjoy once in a while, like Murder, She Wrote or Matlock. It has that cozy mystery vibe and it's set at the perfect era - i.e., late 1980s through the 1990s. Actually I think DM ended in the early 2000s... But, anyway.


The episode (S2 E13) The Bela Lugosi Blues (1995) was one of the first episodes I watched that turned me on to the show, and that's purely for the vampire story. Plus, Julie Carmen plays the vampire antagonist! Yes, Jerry Dandridge's sister, Regina! Julie plays the undead Moriah Thomas, who is killing most of LA's eligible bachelor's, and Jack could be next!

Usually Diagnosis Murder plays things fair and straight, dispelling any notions of fantasy before the shows climax, but with this episode the show leans into the supernatural and doesn't fix it with a bend towards reality.

Is Mark hallucinating, high with fever, or dreaming?? None of the above! The story begins with Dr. Jack Stewart, who's thrown into Moriah Thomas's sights after he is forced to attend a bachelor's in the field of medicine party, which Moriah, as editor of Empire Magazine, is hosting at the publisher's mansion. The party is just a Livestock show as Moriah scouts out her new meal.

After another one of the bachelor finalists is killed--by exsanguination, with two small puncture wounds on the neck--Dr. Sloan and Jack have their confrontation with the vampire. Moriah, in her final battle with Dr. Mark Sloan, tosses our protagonist like he's a doll a few times, as well as Jack. And she flies! Well, glides. Jack finally stabs Moriah through the heart and she dies confessing to the bachelor's murders, in a weird echoing demonic voice. Mark's son receives a gift at the end, a nice big Mr. Pointy, a wooden stake. A little late, but the thought does indeed count, even if it was in jest.

And the episode ends just like that, with apparently Drs. Stewart and Sloan, vampire hunters!!

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